"That which doesn't kill us makes us stronger"

I drafted the title of this post back in November of last year.  That's how long it has been... I never really wrote anything that day, just the title.  It's time to write something about it and put everything to rest, it's time to move on.

Break ups are tough and painful and just a bitch to go through... unless they're not really break ups and merely rejection.  What hurts more?  I don't think that matters at this point.  Although, rejection has the added stab to your ego... a real excrutiating pain to your sense of self. 

I wish I could blame it all on him, but I was a big part of the problem.  I kept holding on to things when I shouldn't have been.  I had unfounded expectations when I should have been more honest with myself.  I knew the deal... and I should have started the conversation earlier.  BUT I'm stubborn and sometimes, I just enjoy living in a fairy tale.  I also knew that it was going to be difficult to hear the truth. 

My friends were great about this whole thing.  They listened (a lot!) and voiced their opinions on the matter.  Of course, I was the hard-head and went on with my delusions.  They never said, "I told you so" even if they so want to do it, they knew I will realize the shit I'm in sooner or later (or much later).  I love them. 

It's a tale as old as time.  Girl likes boy, boy doesn't like girl back.  In my story, girl will shed (a lot!) of tears, but she knows she must move on.  Girl will wipe her tears, stand up with her head held high.  She will not hate.  She will be a better person.  She will be happy like she was before she met him. 

Ermagherd! It's 2013?!

It seems like I fell into a deep sleep and woke up to a new year.  It's not even that new anymore... we're almost a quarter through the year.  Where has all the time gone?  I think I did try to push the pause button, not realizing that the world will continue on even without me.  What a cruel world.  

Just off the top of my head, here are the things that have happened since April 2, 2010:

• The SF Giants won the World Series --- twice, in 2010 and 2012.
• Don't Ask, Don't Tell got repealed
• Arab Spring
• Bin Laden and Gadhafi are goners
• Japanese Earthquake and Tsunami
• Liz Taylor died and Lindsay Lohan played her in a Lifetime movie, other celebrity deaths:  JD Salinger, Amy Winehouse, Steve Jobs, Kim Jong Il, Whitney Houston, Adam Yauch*, Neil Armstrong* (*we share the same birthday)
• Prince William marries Kate Middleton and now she's knocked up!
• Prez Barry got re-elected
• Niners made it to Superbowl XLVII
• Fiscal Cliff and Sequester --- big buzzwords!
• Lots of mass shootings :(

Here's what's happened to me since:

• Got into another car accident, drives a different car... again!
• Traveled to England and Paris, Maui, Dallas...
• Attended Commercial Lending School in Sacramento
• Recently resumed graduate program at GGU
• Started Zumba and Bikram Yoga
• Tried online dating --- will not disclose where, haha!  I kinda hate it really, but that story's for another day... or days...
• Visited the Philippines after 8 years

I think I have become a bore with age.  I'm reading this back to myself and it BORED me!  Oh well... I am a bit rusty.  A lot of things have definitely changed.  I feel like I want to be more open with my thoughts now than I was previously.  I highly doubt I will run for office so I should probably not worry about how the content of this blog could affect my future.  Tumblr's happened to the world, what have I got to be ashamed of with this blog. ;)

Good Friday?

Today's Good Friday. I've always observed traditional practices during Lent... not this year. To start with, it's not that easy to observe Lent after moving to the U.S. (also, I am part of the workforce now), but I have modified it a bit where I can still attend mass, do the confession, etc. I also abstain from doing something (usually shopping, eating meat) beginning Ash Wednesday and during the season's 40-day duration.

I am from a devout Catholic family. We attended mass regularly, I attended Catholic school from kindergarden through college, my brother was an altar-server, my sister and I were members of "Hijas de Maria" and the children's choir. I was even secretary of the Religion Club in high school. That's right, a club with a lot of praying involved.

Even with that background (which was pretty common if one was raised in the predominantly Catholic Philippines), I always considered myself a liberal Catholic. Liberal in the sense that I (to a certain extent) support pro-choice; I support birth control and contraception; I am all for same-sex marriage. Our mother always respected our beliefs, and gave us the right to walk our own religious paths. I chose the liberal path, taking with me the Catholic "essentials:" the 10 Commandments, knowing the 7 capital sins, support of charity and social justice. I may sound simple-minded and even naive, but it works for me.

So why is this Good Friday different from previous ones? You know when you've been in a long-term relationship and you want to take a breather for awhile... just to take in everything and assess the status of your relationship? That's how I feel right now as a Catholic. It's like you've been together for so long and you're just together because it's convenient and comfortable. Of course, this has been triggered by the whole "Catholic abuse scandals." It just made the question in my head all the more unavoidable: "Am I really a part of that church?" But FYI, I am still a believer, I don't think my relationship with God has changed. It's more like, "do I really want a middle man in our relationship?" Moreso, a middle man who tells you to follow all sorts of things while they sweep all sort of (kinky) things under the rug.

Am I just jumping the Anti-Catholic bandwagon? I don't know. It's one of those "hating-the-establishment" sentiment that I'm feeling right now. Should I explore other organized religion or be a "Cafeteria Catholic?" I really don't know.

One things for sure, I know I'll still end up going to Easter Sunday services. It can't be helped... especially when mom's around.

Chia Homer: The First Week

Over the joyful holiday season, a colleague of mine gave me a Homer Chia. He thought it was a brilliant idea but in my opinion I thought it kinda sucks that I'd have to take care of something (and he calls it a gift???). Don't get me wrong, I love Homer with all my heart but I don't have a green thumb and I suck at taking care of things in general --- this gift was bound for my "won't-ever-open" pile.

But the change of year brought about a change in me and all of a sudden, I felt that I should take Homer Chia on as a challenge, my first this 2010. I am going to make sure that Homer grows the lush 'fro as illustrated in the box:

As an afterthought (I know, this is what I meant by not knowing how to take care of things), I decided to document the progress of the 'fro's growth. Here's how it went down the first week:

DAY 1

Planting Homer's Head

Planting Homer's Head with instructions read by the soon-to-be famous Jason Vincent (also the donor of Chia Homer)

Chia Homer's home in the lunchroom

DAY 2

A gorgeous shot of Chia Homer's seeded back

Chia Homer smiling back at me, I think

DAY 3

Still no growth, WTF?

DAY 4

You know how I said that this was just an afterthought? Yeah, I forgot to take a picture on Day 4. What kind of scientist am I? I am not.

DAY 5

Chia Homer basking in the glorious sun... WITH SQUIGGLY STUFF GROWING!!!

A close up of the squigglies growing out of Chia Homer's head

So a week is technically 7 days, but since Chia Homer lives in a lunchroom, I'll follow the work week and end this 1st week on Day 5. I'm crossing my finger for lush foliage next week.

Stay tuned.

The Tonight Show Drama

My opinion: Jay Leno is a douche and I loved that Jimmy Kimmel ripped him apart like he did last night (I even watched the Jay Leno show intentionally). Sure, Jeff Zucker is the biggest douche of all the douches involved in this douchebaggery but it's just so easy to blame Jay Leno. His chin is an easy target, I guess.

It's sad that Conan is getting better ratings now that he's almost ending his helm on The Tonight Show desk. I'd love to see him on Comedy Central but Stewart/Colbert already has the late night slots covered. I am hoping not to watch him on Fox. Oh well, I will continue to watch this drama unfold.

Also, I hope he shows up on his tribute on Sunday. It would suck if he doesn't.

UPDATE: I just received an e-mail from the event organizers that Coco just cancelled. Sad face. I don't and can't really blame him though.

David Sedaris - Part Deux

Now that Christmas is over and Joe's opened his new favorite gift ever... I can now tell the story of how I came to find out the most mind-blowing fact of the year (see previous entry).

I went to another DS reading and I bought the Onion book he recommended (so I could have a book signed for me) and I said that the book was a rip-off bec it didn't' include my country, this was how our exchange went (imagine it with his voice):

DS: What country are you from?

Me: The Philippines

DS: Yeah, it's there... check the index

Me: (Flipping the pages) Oh yeah, it's there!

DS: I like the Philippines.

Me: W-w-what??? You've been there?

DS: Yes, in fact, I even went to Wowowee... it's pretty entertaining.

Me: (mind-blown)


So, I know they say, "if there are no pictures, it didn't happen," but whatever... he also said that he went to Hobbit House in Malate which I do wish I have a picture of... Macy*s Christmas Elf in the Hobbit House = WIN!

Mind-blowing fact of the year (or my lifetime even):

DAVID SEDARIS HAD BEEN TO WOWOWEE.

That.is.all.